Oh Me Nerves! » silly

I’ll Go With D, Regis. Final Answer.

Steve — Mon, 31 Aug 2009 11:55:43 +0000

It’s A Miracle!

Steve — Sat, 29 Aug 2009 13:39:57 +0000

Imagine my surprise! I sit down to my breakfast and get ready to dig in. There, burnt into my pancakes is a mirror image of myself staring directly up at me! Not Jesus… not the Virgin Mary… just good ol’ Steve.

It was awesome… I could hardly believe what I was seeing.

Oh, and boy am I delicious! Especially with maple syrup.

Extra! Extra! Read All About It!

Steve — Wed, 26 Aug 2009 11:23:58 +0000

More than 400 posts in just over 4 years… my first post was August 21, 2005. I started out on a public blogging site and eventually purchased my own domain here at www.ohmenerves.com and the rest is history!

If you wanna check them out, click on the Random Posts link in the sidebar and travel in my blog time machine. Have fun!

He Never Knew What Hit Him

Steve — Sat, 22 Aug 2009 14:35:49 +0000

Saturday morning. I kind of enjoy it when I’m up earlier than the others. Brew a pot of coffee, toast a couple (4) of slices of raisin bread and sit out on the back deck. There’s a gentle, warm breeze and the soothing sounds of other people working on their lawns.

I’m sitting here in my screened gazebo enjoying this little piece of heaven. One side of the gazebo is open, the screen is most useful in the evenings to keep out the moths and the mosquitoes. Enter stage left… one bumble bee the size of a small hummingbird. This thing was freakin’ HUGE! I stealthily slither toward the screen door where we have a fly swatter handy for such occasions. As I tip toe over toward the buzzing intruder he sees me. In an instant he is turned around and flying full throttle toward me. I swing the swatter and BAM! Home run! The little shagger is over at the other end of my deck, missing a leg and sporting a twisted wing and probably one hell of a headache. There he was bumbling about trying to recover and trying for all his might to sting whatever he came in contact with. Go ahead you little frigger… thrust your stinger all you want, you won’t be stinging nobody today. Squish!

Cleaning The Inside of Your Screen

Steve — Thu, 01 Jan 1970 02:59:59 +0000

Thanks Gary.

Child’s Prayer

Steve — Mon, 01 Jun 2009 15:13:10 +0000

Dear God,

This year, can you please send some clothes to all those poor ladies in daddy’s computer?

zyxwvutsrqponmlkjihgfedcba

Steve — Thu, 02 Apr 2009 00:33:26 +0000

Everyone is familiar with the alphabet song, with breaks for breaths and scaling up and down of the tone as you go. It kinda goes like this:

“(scaling up) abcdefg (breathe… scaling down) hijklmnop (breathe… scaling up) qrs (scaling down) tuv (scaling up) wx (scaling down) y and z; (breathe) now I know my ABCs, next time won’t you sing with me.”

But… can you do it backwards? A long time ago, I learned to recite the alphabet backwards. The technique is a little different. There’s no tune and the breaks are different, but once you’ve learned it it never goes away.

Recite the letters below. No tune, keep it monotone. Ok… take a deep breathe and try it… out loud. No cheating. I’ve grouped the letters 3+3+7+7+3+3. The spaces in the string of letters indicate a slight pause, for rhythm.

zyx wvu tsrqpon mlkjihg fed cba

Try it a few times… and then try it without reading it off the screen. Drop back and tell me your wild and crazy stories of how you impressed all your friends with your new found talent.

12 or 13…

Steve — Wed, 25 Mar 2009 21:40:38 +0000

… the name of my last post? (Go ahead, check it out.)
… the number of days since my last post? (About average lately, actually.)
… the number of posts in my backyard fence? (Just a guess.)
… the number of backyards I can see from my backyard? (Another guess.)
… the number of weeks since I started my diet? (… not many more pounds than that as well.)
… the age will guarantee you 5 to 10? (Where did that come from?)
… the total hours sleep I got last weekend? (Directly correlated to the number of hours I spent painting the kitchen.)
… the number of months that have at least 29 days in them? (Made you think twice on that one, right?)
… the seating capacity at the table for the Last Supper? (Always room for one more!)
… the times my wife has told me she likes that Cheerios “It says ‘Shut up, Steve’” commercial? (Seems like a lot more, actually.)
… the amount of snow, in inches, of our worst storm this winter season, so far? (Not too bad, but we had a lot of them.)
… the number of items you can expect when you order a dozen of something at a bakery? (Baker’s dozen? Get it?)
… the number of questions in this blog post? (Thought you’d never ask.)

12 or 13?

Steve — Fri, 13 Mar 2009 21:50:41 +0000

This will drive you nuts, if you let it. Count the people in the drawing, wait for the image to change, then count them again.

Thanks Cindy!

Victoria’s Secret?

Steve — Thu, 19 Feb 2009 05:24:14 +0000

Thanks Jack!