What does a sane, rationally-minded person do when one notices he has a piece of bacon that could arguably be divinely crafted in the image of the Virgin Mary or perhaps Mother Theresa?
He creates an altar, lights candles, charges admission, enjoys 15 minutes of fame in The Enquirer and ultimately sells it for a nice tidy profit on eBay, that’s what he does.
What does the author of Oh Me Nerves! do? He nukes the bacon and eats it.
Yummy. Tastes like chicken.
