Aaahhh, Spring. My favourite time of the year. It’s the time of year when a young man’s fancy turns to romance and a young woman’s heart is a-flutter with anticipation of her husband cleaning up a winter’s worth of dogshit in the backyard.

I’ve never seen so much shit in one place. Well, not really… I’ve been around farms and stuff, but I cleaned up five gallons of shit today that was produced all winter by my 15 pound dog, Meeka. Shovel after shovel load. It was so plentiful that I could see dog dung when I closed my eyes. Anyone who’s ever gone blueberry picking would know what I’m talking about. After spending a couple of hours blueberry picking, all you can see is blueberries. Close your eyes, you see blueberries. Go to sleep, you dream about blueberries. When you are picking them, you don’t know where to start. Well, that’s the way the shit was today. Little tootsie rolls all over the back yard. But, trust me… they don’t taste like tootsie rolls. I’ll never make that mistake again.

I once had a veterinarian tell me that I should switch my dog over to soft, canned food instead of feeding her the dry Dog Chow that we feed her. I explained to the vet that with the dry stuff, her poops are easy to clean up. They come out in little tootsie rolls that pick up quite easily. The vet then kindly explained to me that it may not be so easy or comfortable for the dog though… Well, I assured the vet that as soon as my darling puppy met me half way, and started helping me clean up her crap, I’d be more than happy to reciprocate with food easier on her exit shute. She knows the deal, the ball’s in her court.

Update: I had to update this post with a different picture of blueberries. The original was copyrighted and its owner asked me to remove it.